Bigger than Broadchurch?

"Stop standing there and COOK!"

“Stop standing there and COOK!”

It’s the MasterChef final tomorrow!  Like the day now known as ‘Broadchurch Day’, there are plenty of burning questions and in a little under twenty-four hours they will all be answered.  Has Larkin lost it?  His ‘fifty shades of pink’ fish stew looked like it came from Tesco, and general consensus was that it tasted like it did as well.  Did he deliberately drop the botched soufflé last week?  

Is Natalie really getting more attractive and awesome as the show progresses?  She has a touch of the old Eliza Dolittle about her – and it is really rather fascinating.  She sure can re-skin the hell out of a duck too.  Does this make her marriage material?  And what about Ryan Gosling Dale?  Is he destined to play the second fiddle to flash-in-the-pan Larkin or the quietly-brilliant and fit Natalie?  The well-chiselled Dale (as one of my besotted female mates likes to call him) seems to be mired in a state of perpetual faintness, like a piano with the first two-thirds of keys missing.  Dainty, but where’s the whumph?

Well, tune in to BBC1 tomorrow evening at nine p.m. sharp to find out.  If you don’t, John will find you and turn your ears into jus.  Gregg will most likely just sit around and wait for pudding.

© Mike Dalley, May 2013

© Mike Dalley, May 2013

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